Monday, May 7, 2012

Trust glue

Hello Beautiful

I was conversing with a close friend about the fragility of relationships.  All of our relationships, romantic, familial, or amicable, have a sense of delicacy.  I am reminded of the flowers I saw last spring in the botanical garden.  The fragility of their short lives is matched by the strength of their beauty.

The strength in interpersonal relationships stems from trust.  When we place trust in another individual we choose not only to allow them next to us, but we invite them into our world.  I think one of the largest misconceptions about relationships is they inherently have a level of trust.  Especially if that trust has had no reason to be.  Trust is earned and developed over time.  Not necessarily time that is measured by a clock, but time measured in experience. 

Soldiers build a deep trust in battle.  Trust among friends grows when they come through in a time of need.  Business partners earn trust with each fair deal.  We are foolish when we place a distortional amount of trust in individuals.  It is how internet scams make their money and predators take advantage of the bar scene.  We are cautious of these extreme forms of misplaced trust.  Our troubles stem from the trust we place in those close to us.  Those who do not mean to hurt us.

Trust is the binding agent of intertwined lives.  If you have too much glue and not enough material, the two items will never stick.  The amount of trust should be proportional to the depth of the relationship.  I trust my brother greatly.  Though he has let me down in our lifetime, overall he comes through when I need him.  He is the only one I trust with my passwords, bank information, and other great secrets of my life.  My close friends I also trust greatly.  They have not done anything to break my trust, but they have not earned the same status as my brother.  So while I would trust them to plan a weekend getaway, they are not getting a copy of the house keys just yet.

You are an amazing person.  Make people earn your trust.  It will build stronger, lasting relationships.  You deserve to have people in your life that know and respect your worth.  Friends you can count on.  People that know you are beautiful.

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